Tuesday, 23 March 2010

In the Dream

In the dream, I am sitting in a classroom. The classroom is L-shaped, and I am located at the far end of the shorter leg; the person teaching the lesson is out of sight around the corner. I am sitting not on a chair but on my bed, and next to me, also on the bed, is a naked woman. She is young and voluptuous.

The lesson is on Percy Bysshe Shelley. Although I would like to learn about Percy Bysshe Shelley, and to demonstrate the little that I already know, I am distracted. The naked woman keeps talking to me and flirting mildly. After a while it occurs to me that I should share my duvet with her, so that she can preserve her modesty, but she interprets this gesture as a come-on. She snuggles up next to me and starts to massage my genitals, which makes it very difficult to concentrate on what the invisible teacher is saying.

At some point, the world begins to end. Spaceships or meteorites appear in the sky, bearing down on us with murderous intent. There are also volcanoes. The prospect of learning about Percy Bysshe Shelley seems less and less appealing, the prospect of having sex with the naked woman more and more so. She confides in me that she is a porn star. We leave the classroom and rush across the city, which is tumbling down around us, in search of a good hotel. I am worried about the cost of the room.

Finally, we find a hotel, but there is an enormous queue of refugees at the front desk. Before we can check in, we are suddenly Ghostbusters, fighting a predator in the Arctic with the aid of a team of samurai. The predator wins: I have been cock-blocked by my unconscious fixation with '80s sci-fi movies.

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