Thursday 14 May 2009

Listening

You need to be listening to music for this. I could tell you what music I’m listening to, but I don’t think it matters. Something upbeat, anyway. And you need to read fast. Don’t let your attention settle for so much as an instant; just glide on through. Like something the poet Tony Hoagland once wrote (I paraphrase): “I’ve been reading a book about pleasure/How you have to glide through it without grasping/Like an arrow/Passing through its target.” That’s a credo if ever I heard one. (If you must know, then, I’m streaming the new Wilco album off their website FOR ONE DAY ONLY. It sounds good.) Oh, but that little parenthesis cost me: now I’ve lost momentum. Or maybe I’d already lost it and the parenthesis was a way of prolonging the momentum for a few more seconds. Who knows? The important thing is that we’re back on track now. Keep moving. Keep close to the ground. This song is slower, but we all knew that was going to happen sooner or later; we can compensate. All is well. The important thing is to maintain focus. To keep the aperture of your thoughts at a constant size, so that they aren’t impeded or prematurely ejaculated. Because then where would we go? What would we do? If I was a disciplined man, I would set myself the task of writing until the album ends. I’m not, as you know; I can already feel my motivation ebbing away. Three songs in? Four? I’m now resigned to falling short. Perhaps because I’m interrogating my intentions. I want to mean something; I want to write something to be pondered. That wasn’t my initial intention, I don’t think. Pass through without grasping. Impossible. What sort of person could do that? Only an animal could. Our perception (true/false) of our capacity to ration experiences—to organise our environment to our benefit—is the BIG thing about us. Probably. Or perhaps that’s more of a western thing? I’m far too western to know about that. One more song down. What are you listening to?

1 comment:

yrhandsmyknees said...

Alkaline Trio.

Hey, i get your movement.